• Home
  • About
  • My Blog
    • Relationships
    • Sex
    • Quotes
  • Contact Me

All things Erotica

~ By Bella

All things Erotica

Tag Archives: submission

My submission

30 Wednesday Jul 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in Quotes, Relationships, Short Stories

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

BDSM, love, sex, submission

“It isn’t about the dominance for me, it’s about the submission. Don’t get me wrong I love being dominated too and I need a strong character to submit to but it’s more of a turn on for me if it isn’t forced. If I make the choice to submit completely to your will. I don’t need to be chained. Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you. That’s my gift to you; my submission.”

Advertisements

Link

Shibari on Pinterest

19 Monday May 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in My Blog, Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

BDSM, bondage, intimacy, photo, rope, shibari, submission

 

Bad Feminist

10 Saturday May 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in My Blog, Relationships

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

control, feminism, intimacy, love, power, submission

I always thought of myself as a feminist but there are days where I no longer fully understand what that even means.  To me the essence of feminism was about giving women a choice and celebrating that choice whatever it may be.  My Mum was a stay at home mum, she was there every day when I came home from school, it was what she wanted and I believe it gave me the structure I needed when I was younger and benefited the family as a whole.  It was what worked best for us then.  I on the other hand have been to University (twice – I like to learn!) and have worked for most of my adult life.  The reason I stopped working was to take care of my family, it became impractical to work while my Mum was undergoing cancer treatment and I had young children at home.  As Mum has improved though I feel a sense of judgement.

“When are you going back to work?”

“You can’t sit around and do nothing you know!”

“Do you really want to be one of those stay at home mums who doesn’t have a life?”

“You’re better than that?”

All comments that I have had thrown at me recently and I began to wonder at what point did we stop celebrating a woman’s right to choose and decide it was okay to judge each other for not doing everything?  There is no way I could have taken care of my family, taken my Mum to the hospital daily and worked a full time job and I was incredibly lucky that I was in a position where I didn’t have to but at what point did putting your family first make you open to judgement.  Looking through the jobs pages I see so many openings for carers, babysitters, cleaners and it occurs to me that you didn’t see as many positions advertised because that was what women did, unpaid and largely unappreciated.  Telling a woman that she isn’t good enough and that she should be doing more is not what feminism is about.  Yes there are still feminist issues to be addressed.  When women do the same work and cover the same hours as their male counterparts they deserve the same wage for it but I find myself wanting to fight for it less and less because I see so many self proclaimed feminists who don’t seem to understand what the word means and I don’t want to be associated with them. I don’t want to be a feminist if it means judging other women for not making the same choices as me, I do not wish to celebrate my femininity by belittling men and I don’t want to feel like I’m failing because I can’t fulfil all these different roles and be as successful as I would want to be in them.

I love men.  I like knowing I have my partners love and support at the end of the day.  That he cherishes me and wants to care for me as I want to care for him.  I expect him to respect me as I respect him.  I like it when he holds the door open for me.  Not because he thinks I’m incapable of opening a door but out of courtesy and I like taking care of him in return.  I want my partner to feel loved and respected in our relationship and I expect him to make me feel the same way.  Working day Bella is very different to After Hours Bella.  I can be in charge in all other areas of my life but when at home with my partner I need him to take charge so that I can let go and I trust him to care for me and make the right choices for us during that time.  I get to release all the stress of my day and he takes it all on and deals with it for me.  I definitely get the better end of that deal!

I support a woman’s rights to choose whatever path they wish to take in their lives.  I celebrate the differences between the sexes and I will work hard to succeed at all my own endeavors while supporting those in my life.  I am a feminist!

Quote

“All right, boy…

12 Wednesday Mar 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in My Blog, Quotes

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

erotic, intimacy, ovid, submission

“All right, boy, skewer me. I’ve dropped my defenses,
I’m an easy victim. Why, by now
Your arrows practically know their own way to the target
And feel less at home in their quiver than in me.”
― Ovid, The Erotic Poems

At what point do you become a masochist?

11 Tuesday Mar 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in Relationships, Sex

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

BDSM, domination, intimacy, love, masochism, pleasure and pain, sadism, sex, sexual relationship, sexual submission, submission

I’ve been pondering this question a lot lately and I’m struggling to find an answer.  There have been elements of sexual submission that have appealed to me from my first sexual relationship and naturally that has developed as I’ve tried new things.  I’ve never felt as if there were particular acts that I had to include in order to have a fulfilling sexual relationship but recently I find my sexual response to be far more intense if an element of pain is included.  It doesn’t have to be much, spanking, flogging, the use of nipple clamps is something I particularly enjoy right now but will this evolve further and at some point will I feel these things have to be included in order to feel fulfilled sexually.  Am I becoming more masochistic as I get older? and what does that even mean?

masochist
Web definitions
  1. someone who obtains pleasure from receiving punishment

    http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=masochist

If there wasn’t a part of me that obtained pleasure from punishment then I surely wouldn’t allow myself to be in a relationship where my partner was allowed to punish me.  Does that make all submissives masochists?

I can hear cries from submissives reading this saying no absolutely not but then at what point is the balance between pleasure and pain just right for it to be described as masochism?  Does there have to be an emotional element?  I’m not okay with humiliation.  Does more extensive physical damage need to occur? I’m definitely not okay with being cut.  Neither of those things is specifically stated when defining masochism though so how do you decide?

Finally, if masochism is simply the act of obtaining pleasure from pain then why is it seen as such a perversion even by some in submissive relationships who receive punishment.  It seems far more perverse to be in a relationship where you allow that but gain no pleasure from it.

 

Quote

The joy of submission

28 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by Bella Nyx in Quotes, Relationships

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

BDSM, intimacy, Life, love, relationships, release, sex, submission

“It’s hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That’s part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can’t refuse anything and can’t even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
― Cherise Sinclair, Dark Citadel

I came across the above quote the other day and this for me is one of the absolute joys of submission.  I am the most confident, independent and in control woman in every other aspect of my life and I find it so hard to let go of all the stress and baggage which comes with that but through submission I find my bliss.

Follow All things Erotica on WordPress.com

Follow on Twitter

Follow @BellaNyxWrites

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 121 other followers

Bella Nyx

Bella Nyx

Blogs I Follow

  • Beautiful Life with Cancer
  • Prone to Wander
  • Blog of SACPROS - A Leading Mental Health Resource Directory for the Greater Sacramento Region
  • The Dom Next Door
  • Good Clean Fun
  • Pagan Connection
  • Mary C. M. Phillips
  • Coffee Together
  • Erotic Ramblings
  • The Fickle Heartbeat
  • Jnana's Red Barn
  • Growing Up Little
  • Dr. Perv's Blog
  • Kandy Sparks' Blog of Erotica
  • JamesRadcliffe.com
  • HealthyMasters
  • Advance Reading Copy
  • Insidethelifeofmoi
  • UP!::urban po'E.Tree(s)
  • The 365 Poetry Project
  • Candice's BookShelf
  • International Bellhop Travel Magazine
  • Gabriel Lucatero
  • My Journey as a Submissive
  • Hot Bottoms
  • Sex Stories | KinkNote
  • Books, Quotes and Chatter
  • lauraagudelo272
  • Gio. ✎
  • Kristen Hansen Brakeman
Advertisements

Blog Stats

  • 6,995 hits

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Beautiful Life with Cancer

Discovering the Gift

Prone to Wander

musings of a lost girl and a lover of the light

Blog of SACPROS - A Leading Mental Health Resource Directory for the Greater Sacramento Region

sacpros.org is devoted to breaking down the barriers which prevent access to mental health services by providing easy access to available services in the community

The Dom Next Door

A peek through the keyhole into the life of a BDSM Dominant

Good Clean Fun

It's what happens when a regular girl goes kink

Pagan Connection

A Pagan Information Resource

Mary C. M. Phillips

Caffeine-induced epiphanies and occasional literary musings

Coffee Together

Life, philosophy, and art in 500 words or fewer. A blog by fiction writer Christopher Chinchilla.

Erotic Ramblings

Dirtier, the better

The Fickle Heartbeat

A blog about love or lack thereof

Jnana's Red Barn

Come view the world from my loft

Growing Up Little

A woman exploring the world of BDSM and sharing what she discovers...

Dr. Perv's Blog

The Doctor Is In...

Kandy Sparks' Blog of Erotica

Exploring the world of erotica with an open mind, through poetry, story telling and more.

JamesRadcliffe.com

HealthyMasters

Be Fit, Be Well, Be YOU! Without Judgement!

Advance Reading Copy

A Book Blog!

Insidethelifeofmoi

An eccentric blogger with a pen and a thousand ideas

UP!::urban po'E.Tree(s)

by po'E.T. and the colors of pi

The 365 Poetry Project

Candice's BookShelf

International Bellhop Travel Magazine

iBellhop.com

Gabriel Lucatero

Fiction Writer

My Journey as a Submissive

Journey of a little and a pleasure slave

Hot Bottoms

Keep Looking Back Over your Shoulder

Sex Stories | KinkNote

Books, Quotes and Chatter

Longtime reader and short-time writer sharing some of her favourite books, quotes etc.

lauraagudelo272

This WordPress.com site is the bee's knees

Gio. ✎

Avete presente quegli scomodi abiti vittoriani? Quelli con la gonna che strascica un po' per terra, gonfiata sul di dietro dalla tournure? Quelli con i corsetti strettissimi e i colletti alti che solleticano il collo? Ecco. Io non vorrei indossare altro.

Kristen Hansen Brakeman

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy